The Invisible Volkswagen
by LillyGirl22
Summary: I had this idea after thinking about how much fun it would be to have an invisible car.  This fic is rated K plus  for some mild swears.


The Invisible Volkswagen

A Megamind One Shot

by LillyGirl22

_So I'm going to write this from two perspectives. First up Roxanne, and then Megamind and then back to Roxanne. I had this idea after thinking about how much fun it would be to have an invisible car. I don't own any of these lovely characters. Yada, Yada Yada. This is rated K+ for a few swears._

I took the stairs two at a time, making it to the upper level of the shop in record time. I was running very late. I had two interviews to do, groceries to get and my car had to be to Louie's Oil Change before five. My phone was buzzing loudly, but I ignored it. I heard clanging and a few minor swear words emanating from some work benches on the far side of the shop. I made a bee line for the swearing. That's where I would find my boyfriend.

My real life honest to goodness boyfriend. I smiled dreamily at the thought. My one of a kind, awesome, kick ass blue boyfriend. It had only been about a month since my world had changed considerably. Only a month since Metro City's one time villain had become her new hero. It had only taken about two days for Megamind and I to come to a satisfactory agreement regarding our relationship. It would have taken less time, I'm guessing, if we hadn't been hounded by reporters and government officials after the defeat of Titan, but it couldn't really be helped. After our whirlwind first week together, things had calmed down considerably.

It hadn't all been easy. I quickly came to realize that Megamind had alot of catching up to do. His life had been such a strange one, devoid any sort of meaningful human interaction. Normal wasn't something he was used to. He was almost wary of it. Afraid of getting "normal" wrong. Not that normal was what we had now, but perhaps, consistent would be a better word. It seemed like every day I had to convince him that I would not leave him, and that yes, he did deserve me.

"Hey," I called out over the sound of a power drill. "I can't stay for long, but I've got lunch!" I held a bag of Chinese food out and shook it. Within seconds, Megamind's head popped out from behind some large piece of machinery he'd been working on.

"Roxanne! I didn't hear you come up." A smile appeared on his face as he made his way through the sea of parts and junk in between him and me. Since he'd turned over a new leaf, his clothing choice had changed slightly. He hardly ever wore a cape anymore, unless it was the white one he'd snagged from Metroman's secret hideout. Today, along with welding goggles pushed up on his forehead, he was wearing a plain black t-shirt and dark gray khakis. Still dark and brooding, just not as likely to cause puncture wounds.

"Yes, well I used my ninja skills. Oh, yeah, and you were using a rather loud power drill." I smiled wryly at him and then flopped down on a leather couch that was set up in one corner of the shop. Megamind sat down next to me and grabbed my hand. A very simple gesture, but one which was usually enough to send shivers up my spine. It pretty much made me feel like a sixteen year old girl again.

"Thanks for lunch! I didn't even know if was lunchtime."

"Ha, when you get to working up here, I wonder if you even know if it's day or night!" My phone began to buzz again, this time I decided to check it. My boss was sending me angry texts.

"Uggg, I have to run or I might just get fired!"

"What?" Megamind looked up from rifling through the takeout bag. "Who would dare to fire you?"

"Hmmm, my boss, if I'm late again. You're a bad influence Mr. Evil Overlord."

"Ha, more like a supremely handsome heroic distraction." He puffed his chest out and smiled devilishly at me.

"Yeah, that too." I smiled sweetly at him and gave him a quick kiss. "I really have to run, I'm not sure how I'm going to make it to Louie's to get my oil changed before five."

"Wait, what?"

"My car needs it's oil changed."

"Who is this Louie?" Megamind sounded suspicious. I had quickly learned that he could be overprotective of me to a fault, but I found it endearing for the most part.

He's the mechanic that I take my car to when it needs fixing. He's on 153rd and Warren, you know, by Lakeside Park."

"Oh, Roxanne, you don't need to take your car to this Louie character anymore."

Where was he going with this? "And why not? Has my car magically stopped burning fossil fuels in a combustion engine and is now running on pixie dust?" I gave him a goofy grin.

Megamind seemed a bit mortified. "No, because I can do all that stuff for you now. I'm you're boyfriend, right? It's my responsibility, and besides that, I want to do it for you."

I blinked at him in surprise. I had never had a handy boyfriend before. And for the last ten years, I had gotten used to taking care of everything on my own. And then it hit me, Megamind could built giant robots and flying motorcycles. Of course he could change the oil in my subcompact car. He was, after all, a super genius.

"Okay. That would be great! That would save me alot of time." I smiled warmly at him and squeezed his hand.

"Wonderful! I'll work on it tonight. You'll have it back tomorrow morning. Do you need to borrow the Hornet in the meantime?"

I smiled again at this generous offer. Both Megamind and Minion were quite attached to their invisible 1951 Hudson Hornet, and the offer to let me drive it was a surprise. The way Megamind babied that thing bordered on the ridiculous.

"That's okay, I have the news van right now, but my car's parked in my building's garage." I grabbed my purse and dug around for my keys. I handed them to him and gave him another kiss.

"Okay, now I really have to go!" We both stood up and he wrapped his arms around me and squeezed me tightly.

"Thanks," he said quietly.

"For what?"

"For letting me be useful."

I gave him an eskimo kiss and said, "Supremely handsome and useful. What a catch!"

He laughed. "I can cook a mean omelet too. Minion taught me!"

Oh man, now he was looking down at me with those big green eyes and I was feeling more and more like I didn't really mind getting fired today. He shook his head as if to clear it and reluctantly released his grip on me.

"Get out of here, Miss Ritchie. You have places to be."

I sighed. "Since when are you the responsible one?"

He grinned and tossed my keys in the air. "Since I got this goody two shoes girlfriend who holds me to a higher standard."

My phone buzzed again, that killjoy of a device. "Someday I will chuck this thing!" I groused. I grabbed my purse and a fortune cookie and with one more parting smile at Megamind, headed downstairs.

"See you tomorrow!"

It's strange, but I didn't even know Roxanne had a car. I suppose I just assumed that she either used a news van or took a taxi. But this, this was too good to be true. Parked in front of me was a supercharged tornado red two door hatchback Volkswagen GTI.

Minion sauntered up behind me and whistled. "Wow, Miss Ritchie really has good taste in cars." I clapped my hands together in delight. "She does indeed, Minion!" I walked around it, kicking the tires, as it where. It wasn't the most expensive package she could have sprung for, but that seemed in line with Roxanne's personality. No nonsense for the most part, with a little bit of unexpected spunk added in.

I cupped my hands against the driver's side window and peered in. Black leather interior. "Hmmmm." I sighed and grinned like an idiot. Yup, that was my Roxanne.

"Okay, Minion. I'm thinking you may not fit in this little go-kart. I'll meet you back at the lair."

"Sure thing." Minion headed back to the invisible car and drove off, waiving to me as he passed Roxanne's parking spot.

I unlocked the door and hopped in. "This is going to be fun!" I said to myself. I turned the key in the ignition and was instantly accosted with country music! "Ugggg." I turned the radio volume down and sighed. Roxanne loved all kinds of music, including my beloved classic rock, but she also had a soft spot for country. I couldn't stand the stuff. We had a lively "debate" going on the subject. She said it was awesome. I said it sucked. We hadn't gotten very far in convincing each other.

And then I noticed the little picture attached to the dash. It was a small snapshot of me and Minion. We were both making goofy faces. I remembered the day she had taken that with her phone. I think I'd had too much caffeine the previous night. A warm smile spread across my face as I sat in my girlfriend's car, breathing in the smell of leather and her perfume. I shook my head to snap myself back to the here and now.

"All right, let's see what this little buggy can do."

I pulled into the lair's main work area about 30 seconds after Minion arrived. Okay, so I had taken full advantage of the fact that Roxanne's car was supercharged. I really couldn't help myself.

Minion got out of the invisible car, and folded his simian arms over his chest. "You must have really been booking it, Sir." I could tell he wasn't too happy with me.

I tried to laugh it off. "What, no, I obeyed all the rules of the road." Minion gave me the evil eye. "Okay, maybe I bent them a bit." Oh, all right, I sped the whole way here, but this thing has some get up and go. It wasn't designed to behave!"

Minion rolled his eyes and sighed. "I don't think Miss Ritchie would like you driving her car so recklessly."

At this, I had to laugh. The times I had taken her for a spin in the Hornet, I hadn't necessarily practiced defensive driving, and she had loved every second of it. It was excellent fun, weaving in and out of traffic and no one around you being the wiser. Of course, Minion hadn't been with us for those rides, so he had no idea that Roxanne had thoroughly enjoyed it.

"Oh, don't be such a sissy fish. I won't make a habit of it." That seemed to placate him somewhat.

"Okay. I'll hold you to that." He stood there, still looking a little miffed, but I could tell he wasn't really angry with me anymore.

Good old Minion. Always looking out for me. And now, I had noticed, he was extending the same sort of watchful attentiveness towards Roxanne as well. Loyal to a fault, he had accepted her into our lives without any hesitation. He hadn't even seemed jealous that I was spending more and more time with Roxanne. I had asked him one day how he felt about everything changing and his answer had been quite simple. "Roxanne," he said thoughtfully, "is the best thing that has every happened to you, Sir." And if fish could cry, he would have been tearing up. "But what about you," I blurted. "No one could ever take your place. I mean, you're my Minion!" Minion had smiled ruefully. "You're right Sir, I am, but Roxanne is something different, she's, well, she's your other half. She's the yin to your yang. That's something I always wanted for you."

At that point in the conversation, it had been my turn to pretend like there was something in my eye.

I was snapped out of my thoughts by Minion punching me lightly on the arm. "Are you daydreaming again? We have get to work on the car."

"Oh, yes, of course. Let's pull it around to the shop." It wouldn't take long to change the oil and make sure all the fluids were topped off. I was hoping to get it done early in the evening so I could tinker on a couple of other projects.

It was 1:39 in the morning when I realized that I had somehow, accidentally taken apart the engine or Roxanne's VW. Actually, Minion had walked into the shop and shrieked. "Sir! Miss Ritchie's car! What have you done?"

I looked down at a piece of the alternator that I was holding. "Oh, hmm, guess I got a little carried away!"

"A LITTLE! Sir, you've completely disassembled it!" I looked around the shop and realized that Minion was indeed correct. Hundreds of parts were strewn over the floor and workstations.

"Well, I couldn't help myself. I've never taken apart a Volkswagen before!" We glared at each other for several minutes before Minion started to laugh.

"What's so funny?"

"Miss Ritchie's going to kill you!"

"Oh no she won't, not if we get if put back together before the morning!"

Minion sputtered and gave me a sly grin, "Who's this we, you're speaking of?"

I tossed him the alternator part. "Who else?"

My alarm promptly went off at 6:45 am. "Uggggg!" I slammed the palm of my hand down on the snooze, but for some reason, the sound didn't go away. "What the?"

No, it was a different buzzing noise. My phone. I rolled over in bed at attempted to grab it off of the night stand. I didn't make it in time. The phone rolled over to voicemail.

And then someone started pounding on my door.

"You have got to be kidding me!" I dragged myself out of bed, threw on a robe and trudged to the door. "This had better be good!" I said under my breath. I was not a morning person.

As I approached the door I heard someone on the other side yell, "Ow, you stepped on my boot!" And someone else said, "Well, you're crowding me, I have big feet!" The voices obviously belonged to Megamind and Minion. I threw open the door dramatically and put on my best grumpy face. It wasn't hard to do, considering I was already grumpy.

"WHAT are you two doing?"

"Oooh, Minion, she doesn't look too happy."

"I told you, Sir, but you refused to listen."

I folded my arms and stood out of the way so they could come in. "Should have listened to the fish, my dear."

But my boyfriend didn't seem to be all that concerned about my potential wrath. He was practically bouncing up and down. "You didn't answer you're phone!" He was acting strange, and he was much too chipper for seven in the morning.

"What's wrong with you? Why are you so twitchy?"

Megamind grabbed my shoulders and gave me a kiss on my forehead. "I had A-LOT of coffee this morning! You won't believe what Minion and I did last night!"

"Hmm, I bet it didn't involve sleeping."

"You are correct, Mizzz Ritchie! We spent our time much more wisely! Oh, grab your slippers. You need to come down to the garage with us." Megamind gently nudged me back to my bedroom to retrieve my scuffed up pink slippers.

"Minion?" I called over my shoulder, "what's going on?"

I caught a glimpse of a nervous smile crossing over Minion's face. That made me feel a bit concerned. Anything that had Minion worried...

"Oh, don't worry so much." Megamind said, almost as if he's read my mind. Or maybe he'd just seen the look on my face. I grabbed my slippers and we headed into the hallway. After about a forty five second elevator ride down to the garage, in which I ascertained that Minion was just as about as sleep deprived as Megamind due to all the giggling he was doing, we were deposited on the parking garage level.

Sitting in the closest parking spot was my VW. It looked just as it had yesterday, but clearly, something was up.

"You have a GREAT, car, Roxanne! Minion and I got to know it pretty well last night."

I was instantly suspicious. "What did you do to it? You didn't do anything that would void the warranty?"

At this Megamind and Minion looked at each other and laughed guiltily. "Um, yes, I'm sure we did."

"Awwww, come on guys! I had three more years on that warranty!" I really should have stayed in bed.

"Perhaps!" Megamind said dramatically, "but did you have this?" He nonchalantly hit a button on a small remote he'd pulled from his pocket.

My car disappeared. And it didn't disappear like the Hornet. I mean, there wasn't even a trace of it. No shimmer, no displacement, it was just gone!

I stood, in my pink fuzzy slippers, with my mouth hanging open.

"Worth getting up for?" Megamind had an adorable lopsided grin on his face.

I finally found my voice. "Its incredible. It's even better than the Hornet! It's flawless!"

"Its a little something Minion and I have been working on! We were hoping to upgrade the stealth on the Hornet, but I got the bright idea to incorporate the new technology into the TGI at about 2:30 when we were putting the engine block back tog..."

Here he trailed off and looked at me. Obviously, he hadn't meant to divulge that little tidbit.

"What? Putting my engine back together?" I put my hands on my hips and tried to look angry, but I was too excited about having my very own invisible car to really be upset.

"Good as new," he said sheepishly. "Actually, better than new! We got a few more mpg's out of it too."

"What, no nitro?" I joked. The smile on my face must have let him know he was out of the woods.

He handed the keys and remote to me and smiled. "Next week!" He leaned in for a kiss and we stood there, in the parking garage, for several minutes which seemed to pass much too quickly, until Minion coughed politely.

"I'm still here, you know," he said.

We both blushed and pulled apart a little.

"Sorry, Minion, we got a kind of carried away." Megamind smiled down at me.

Minion shrugged his shoulders and grinned. "You crazy kids."

I hit the button on the remote control that had a little car shape drawn out in dotted lines, and my car made that familiar "Bweep Bweep" sound that usually announced that it was unlocked. Instead, my car reappeared. I laughed in delight and hit the remote several more times, watching in awe as my car disappeared and reappeared again. "Thanks, guys!"

Megamind and Minion started back towards the Hornet. "Have a nice commute!" Megamind said with a wink as he hopped into the driver's side. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

I gave him a smirk and then looked down at my keys and then back to my car. A huge grin spread over my face. "I won't!"


End file.
